Monday, September 8, 2008

The End of the Tooth Story.....for anyone who has nothing better to do with their time but read a blog about my tooth woes

Way back at the end of June, I forced my dentist to pull one of my wisdom teeth. It was killing me, and I thought having it pulled right before going camping would be the best option. Well after he tugged and yanked and pried for 45 minutes he finally came out victorious over my monster, 4 pronged wisdom tooth....minus (later to be discovered) the other 4 halves of their twisted evil roots. My dentist said he thought he left one root piece in there, but it was small and shouldn't give me any problems. Apparently these roots are supposed to disappear on their own and never cause me anymore grief. HMMM Nope, they're evil and hateful and decided to stay firmly wrapped around some big important nerve in there. Anyway...after enduring a dry socket while camping and still trying to enjoy some of the awesome food (thank you Ryan, Josh, Doh Doh, Mom, & Tony) Oh and thank you Mr. Jackson(who probably won't ever see this, but someone can tell him he got a shout out on my all important blog) for the medication and superb dental care. Ok, so about a month and a half after the initial pulling I finally started feeling normal. Yea! I had decided I was just going to leave the other wise tooth in there. Maybe I needed it. Well after about a week of feeling better I wake up with a monster knot on the side of my jaw. Those darn roots had caused an infection and were surrounded by a big pool of P*ss. I hate that word. I bit the bullet and went to the Oral surgeon who I was trying to avoid. Heaven forbid I have my tooth pulled while feeling absolutely nothing and getting a fine much needed nap at the same time. Like I said maybe I need those wise teeth. I went to his office, xrays and tooth in hand. Yes, I kept my tooth. I thought the tooth fairy would come., but they don't take wisdom teeth. I had put the tooth safely in the xray envelope(I thought it might be helpful if the Dr. could see the demon he was dealing with). I handed the package to the very nice receptionist girl and went and sat down on their very cushy and posh leather couch and started thumbing through a yacht magazine. (It amazes me how the choice of magazines differs according to your area of waiting. Like if you had the joyful task of waiting at the health department for a school shot your magazine choices would be mostly in Spanish and a 5 month old copy of the ENQUIRER or PEOPLE) Anyway back to my story. Suddenly I hear a scream from the receptionist area.
"CHARIS!!!!! "she yelled. I ran around feeling sheepish and embarrassed knowing why she was upset. "Did you know there is a tooth in this envelope?" she questioned.
"Are you serious?" I said, "How the heck did that get in there?" thinking to my self I guess that was stupid to bring my tooth. No one else must ever do that. Stupid,stupid stupid. You're so weird. She disgustedly handed me my tooth which she picked up with a tissue by her fingertips(it had fallen in her lap when she took the xrays out). Hey, it was clean. I had taken it home and brushed it and scrubbed it and bleached it. It was quite magnificent...for a tooth. Well it turns out that when the surgeon started looking at my xray and the fancy one he took he still was puzzled about the number of roots that might be there. He said to me, "I sure wish I could have seen the tooth. It would give some idea of what I'm dealing with when I go in. Now I took the credit.
"But sir", I said proudly, "I kept the tooth and I brought it with me today for this very reason" grinning somewhat painfully with new found appreciation for my oddness. Anyway he gave me some great stuff and I had a very weird but restful nap and came out minus the nasty roots and my other less impressive wisdom tooth. I vaguely remember hearing and seeing things while I was under. As I was waking, I remembered everything so clearly. It wasn't a painful memory. I just kept replaying it over and over. But when I was fully awake, I couldn't remember anything but knowing I had remembered in my subconscious state. Yes, I know I'm strange, but that's OK. You know my name is Chris without the a.... So now almost 2 weeks from my surgery, I see a ray of light. I'm down to 1 pain pill a day and my TMJ is relaxing a little. By the way, for anyone who suffers from TMJ, there is a massage that treats it quite successfully. So, hopefully this will be the end of my saga. Sara says blogging is therapeutic, and I must say this blog turned out to be.

6 comments:

sara jackson said...

I am glad you are feeling better and your teeth are out. Blogging is very therapeutic, I always think my life is not so bad after reading everyone else's blogs.

Summer said...

Glad you are feeling better although I'm sure you'll miss those pretty peacock colored pills :-)

One Krazy Momma said...

Seems like I took one of those right before I wrote this...... Yes, I do believe I did. LOL

Unknown said...

This would be an absolutely hilarious story if it weren't for the fact that I know how much pain you have endured for the past 3 1/2 months. By the way, when I go to your blog and I see the slide show of those Valentine pictures that were taken for me, it sure makes me sad that I don't have them yet. But since you have been suffering from "Tooth Woes" or should I say "Teeth Woes" I will forgive you. SMILE
By the way . . . you can blame your dad for the huge roots. I am missing 2 of my wisdom teeth that were easily pulled out and 2 that never developed so you can't blame me for those genes.

MJN6 said...

So very glad the worst is behind you. (I am not sure that came out exactly right) but you know what I mean. Hey would you PLEASE get those pics to your mom so she will stop making you feel guilty even in your time of suffering!!!!! In your twilight you were probably hearing your mother's voice saying, "Charis, I sure would like those Valentine pictures." Just kidding (I know she will read this and just wanted to get a rise out of her)You deserve a BIG prize from the tooth fairy for that one-I'll remind her for you!!! Love you DohDoh
Hey if you had taken after me you wouldn't have had any wisdom teeth.

ma said...

Loved you Blog. You need to be keeping notes for the book you will someday write. LOVE YOU. We are going to Mobile tomorrow to see Uncle Bob. He is not doing well. Hope to see you Thursday.